Broken but Breathing (Jinx Tattoos Book 2) Read online

  He shook his head at her obvious glee. “She’s a good friend who’s been through a lot. She’s trying to get herself together and I’m helping.”

  “You bringing me some junkie biker bunny?” Kali asked. Her brow furrowed, and her lips curled up with contempt.

  “No, nothing like that. She lost her family a few years back, and it screwed with her head. Put her life on pause. She’s getting back out there and I want to provide a cushion and a safe place.”

  “I take it she doesn’t know you own this place,” Kali said.

  “No, and I want to keep it that way.”

  Kali snickered. “It’s your funeral.”

  “You think she’ll be mad?”

  “I know I’d be pissed if it felt like you pulled one over on me when I was trying to get back on my feet.”

  He thought of her small stature. “I’ll take the risk.”

  “I hope I’m there when this blows up.”

  “You’re so damn bloodthirsty, Kal.”

  She laughed. “Are you kidding me? Have you met my brother? It’s in my DNA.”

  “You got a softer side, you just try to hide it.”

  Kali rolled her eyes. “Is this the blonde I’ve been hearing whispers about?”

  “Gossiping old women, I swear,” Snake muttered.

  She laughed. “So that’s a yes. You want me to show her the ropes, hang back and observe, yeah?”

  Snake nodded. It was time he started testing her to see how well she fit into this world he’d brought her into. Loose lips sank ships, and he needed to know that she could think fast in a sticky situation. For the most part the Wild Ones operated a completely legal operation, but there were always areas of grey.

  “All right, I’ll do what you want. Hopefully, she pans out. It’d be nice to get some female friends around the club.” She finished off her drink, pitched the can in the garbage, and walked out of the room with her full hips swaying. Dressed in a pair of skintight jeans with bedazzled pockets and a white T-shirt that stood out against her mocha-colored skin, she was as sexy as she was sassy. She wore her dark locks in a faux curly Mohawk that highlighted her oval-shaped face, high cheekbones, and full red lips. If he hadn’t been blinded by grief when he first joined, he would’ve gone after her. Now, she was like a sister. Besides, he liked his face the way it was. Her overprotective brother would demolish anyone who tried to do more than flirt with his baby sister.

  A knock on the door and a look at their cameras signaled Es’s arrival. Kali returned to the bar with more clean glasses for the bar.

  “Damn, you’re glowing. How serious is this?” Kali asked.

  “What?” he asked, turning to focus on the woman grinning beside him.

  “Nothing,” she replied, patting his face. “Let’s go let Estelle in.”

  She stalked toward the door with purpose, and Snake felt a moment of apprehension. He never knew what the hell Kali was going to say or do. He rushed after her. Kali opened the door with a grin and his jaw dropped slightly. Es had on a knee-high black wrap dress that showed just how much weight she’d put on, and four-inch heels which made her legs look insanely long. He cleared his throat.

  “Welcome, Estelle. It’s so nice to finally meet you.”

  “It is?” Es said.

  “I told you, my brothers are worse than school girls,” Snake replied, narrowing his eyes at Kali. “Come on in, Kali will take you to the office and perform the interview. I’m a little bias I think.”

  She nodded. “Sounds good. I brought my resume, but it has nothing like this. I–I used to teach fourth graders in my previous life.” Her eyes dimmed, and her shoulders fell.

  “Sometimes I feel like I watch children for a living,” Kali remarked, wrapping an arm around her waist. He watched as Kal steered her toward the back. There was a confidence in her step he hadn’t seen before. Having her where I can keep an eye on her is definitely the way to go. No asshole is going to take advantage of her on my watch.

  §

  Estelle

  “I’m sorry, but I have to ask. How in the hell did you meet Snake?” Kali asked.

  Estelle glanced up from the inventory list she was helping fill out. “I don’t think it’s my story to tell.”

  “Oh, come on, just a hint,” Kali said.

  Estelle laughed. “It’s tame. Whatever crazy scenario you’ve come up with in your mind, throw it out the window. I’m a really boring person, if you haven’t figured that out already.”

  “I don’t believe that at all,” Kali said, studying her with an intensity which made Estelle want to squirm. She resisted the urge. She’d been around enough to know Snake’s friends smelled fear, and would never let up once they saw you were skittish.

  “You should. It’ll save you from being disappointed,” Estelle replied, returning to the wells list of vodka.

  “The way he looks at you tells me differently.”

  “What are you talking about?” Estelle asked.

  “Snake doesn’t just bring people around, especially not women.”

  No, he wouldn’t. He was stuck in limbo the same as she was, but in a different way. Sadness made her frown. Do I even contribute in this relationship? He’d given her so much.

  “We have things in common that are very rare to come by.”

  “Usually there’s nothing deep to see in his eye unless he’s pissed. He hides behind a front. You bring out his humility. I’m still deciding if that’s a good thing or not.”

  “Why wouldn’t it be?” she asked.

  “Not sure what you plan on doing with the power you hold. A woman can twist a man up into knots and fuck with his head.”

  “I highly doubt anyone could do that to Snake and I’m not into playing games,” she said as her anger flared. Does she think I’m playing a sympathy card? Estelle saw the lengths some of the biker bunnies went through to be with the men.

  “We’ll see,” Kali remarked.

  Estelle took a deep breath, unsure how to approach the situation. Last thing she needed was a tense work environment. But she’d spent too many years being walked over and wasn’t looking for a repeat now.

  “Look, Kali, I get that you’re protective. I’ve been around long enough to see why. But what me and Snake have is between us. You want answers, I suggest you go to him. In the meantime, know I’m not here looking for anything but friendship and a job I actually like.”

  Smirking, Kali nodded her head. “You got guts, I’ll give you that. You’ll need them around here. If anyone else told me to mind my own business, even in that nasty nice way you just did, they’d be getting cussed out. But for some reason, I really like you, Estelle. I’m willing to give you the benefit of the doubt. Make no mistake, if you fuck my boy over you’ll be dealing with me.”

  “I’ll be sleeping soundly at night,” Estelle said dryly.

  Kali laughed. “Hot damn, I might’ve made a new friend.”

  “I hope so. I could use all the friends I can get,” Estelle replied honestly.

  “Can’t we all?” Kali asked.

  They moved back to finishing inventory to create an order, and she observed the club. In the day it was all smooth black surfaces, chrome walls, and chrome seating. Black couches were arranged to create intimate seating arrangements throughout the large space. During the night water cascaded down the wall behind the bar that they lit up with blue lights, lending to the name, Rain. They had a mixed crowd in. It wasn’t what she’d expected when Snake offered her the job.

  “What do you think of Rain so far?” Kali asked as they finished their counts.

  “I haven’t seen it in action, but the day-to-day I can handle pretty well. I like that I’m learning the operation before I’m being thrown into the fire. I know I have my certificate, but I know doing it in a controlled environment versus performing on the fly i
s going to make for a learning curve.”

  “Girl, here you won’t use half those fancy drinks. Our regulars live on pretty classic drinks, and the girls will ask for something sweet. You give them good service, and throw in a few of those fancy tricks of yours, and they’ll tip you really well,” Kali said.

  Estelle stood a little taller. “I can do that.”

  “Then you’re all set, Sprite. I want you to work tomorrow. It’s time we see how you handle the floor with traffic. It’s a relatively slow night for us, so you should be fine. I told Snake I’d be working with you personally, so I’m your trainer. That could be a blessing or a curse depending on how it all goes down.”

  “I think we’ll get along just fine,” Estelle said. Fake it until you make it.

  “I hope so. We could use another solid bartender onboard. Not everyone can handle Rain. We have a lot of folks who walked right out those doors not long after they walked in.”

  “Won’t be me.” The promise was to herself. She owed this to Snake. A deep seeded desire to make him proud had taken hold once she’d accepted the job offer. The rest was a need to prove to herself she could do this.

  “Keep the fire about you, Sprite. I’ll let you leave early because I want you back tomorrow at five and you won’t be leaving until close.”

  “Aye, Captain,” she replied, giving a mock salute.

  Kali rolled her eyes playfully as Estelle clocked out and moved to the back to grab her purse from the employee locker room.

  Riding high off her good day, she drove toward her apartment. When her phone rang and Snake’s name appeared, she answered it via her blue tooth.

  “Hey, you have perfect timing. I just got out of work.”

  “How’s that going?”

  She frowned. His voice was off.

  “Good. I have my first actual day tomorrow working from five until close. Are you okay?”

  “No, this gig I’m doing now is a hard one.”

  “Anything I can do to help?” she asked, instantly concerned. It wasn’t like him to skate around issues or be so closed lip about things that bothered him. She knew the Wild Ones were more than a motorcycle club and whatever he was doing probably wasn’t legal. A few years ago that would’ve horrified her. Now, she couldn’t care less.

  “Just talk to me. Tell me how things are with you.”

  “Good, class ends Friday if you can believe it. I’ll be graduating. I’m enjoying working at Rain, though Kali can be a real hard ass.”

  “She giving you shit?” Snake asked. The edge in his voice made her shiver.

  “No more than she would any other newbie. It’s fine.”

  “If she steps out of line—”

  “You’ll what? Fight my battles for me. No, I’ve got this. I’m more worried about you right now.”

  “Been a long time since that happened for me,” he said softly.

  “I understand if you can’t tell me everything, but I can’t help if I have nothing to go on.”

  “The area we’re in is littered with ghosts from my past. I got a case of the what ifs. You know, they never found my Jocelyn’s body. That’s one of those things that keeps me up at night.”

  Jesus. “I’m sorry, Xavier.” She was learning to distinguish the man from the larger-than-life biker.

  “Me too. What if I’d had a gun in the house instead of that bat? Hell, what if I had never moved them down to this shit hole town in the first place?”

  “You can’t do this to yourself. You’ll never be able to answer these questions. I won’t tell you everything happens for a reason, because that’s just bullshit. But we both know you can’t go back in time. If it was that easy we would’ve done it by now.”

  “Fuck, since when are you the voice of reason?” he asked shakily.

  “Well I have been learning from the best.”

  “You really do have a mouth on you once you open up.”

  “I got that from you, too,” she said, happy to hear the shift in his mood.

  “I must be a pretty good teacher then.”

  “That you are. Better?”

  “A little. The worst part about losing a child is not being able to bring them home or know what their final moments were like. Even if they were awful, I need to know.”

  She wanted to ask why, but didn’t. This was past her pay grade, and the last thing she wanted to do was set him back off. “I hope you get the closure you deserve, Xavier.”

  “Believe me, I’m working on that.”

  His words were dangerous, and his voice held a tone she’d never heard him use before. It sent a chill up her spine.

  A knock sounded on his end. “I have to go. I’ll call you later, yeah?”

  “I’ll be here,” she said, suddenly very concerned about his business trip.

  §

  “Have you thought any more about what you want to do after graduation on Friday? I know they help you with job placement,” Jole asked.

  The innocent question put her on the spot. “I’m narrowing my decision.”

  “Where are you thinking about?” she asked, flipping through her menu. Todd was manning the drop-off and pick up of the kids, so they’d opted for an impromptu coffee and dessert at their favorite local diner.

  “Well, the thing is, I found a place.”

  “What? Why didn’t you tell me?” Jole asked as she finished off the final bite of her pecan pie.

  “Because I wasn’t sure if I wanted to commit to it or not. I went in for an interview and took time to think it over.”

  “Makes sense. What restaurant did you go with?” Jole asked. Her face lit up, and she leaned forward over the table.

  “I didn’t.”

  The corners of Jolene’s mouth turned down and her thick eyebrows arched. “I’m not following you.”

  “It’s a club. You might have heard of it… Rain.”

  “Rain?” Jole repeated the name. Her eyes went out of focus. “Wait. The place near downtown!”

  “That’s the one.”

  “That place has been raided and is known to cater to bikers, Estelle. I don’t care how swank it looks on the inside, it isn’t safe.”

  “I don’t agree.”

  “How did you even find out about this job? Is this what that school is offering you?” Jole asked, spitting out the world school like it left a bad taste in her mouth.

  “No, Snake got me the gig. He works there, so it’s not like I’d be on my own.”

  “Wait. Who?” Jole asked shaking her head.

  “Snake…my support.”

  “Why does he have an animal name, Estelle?” Jole’s face clouded with anger and confusion.

  “Reptile, and it’s a nickname, they all have them,” Estelle replied.

  “They?” Jole said.

  “The Wild Ones, its Snake’s Motorcycle Club.”

  “Are you out of your mind?” Jole hissed.

  “We’ve both seen me on the verge of insanity. This isn’t it,” Estelle said, determined to remain calm.

  “You’ve been hanging out with bikers this entire time?”

  “Well, usually just one biker, but yeah, sometimes we hang out at the clubhouse.”

  Jole shook her head. “Listen, I know you’re trying to get back out there, but this isn’t the right way to go about things.”

  “Why? Because you don’t approve? You’ve never met any of them and yet here you are judging.”

  “I don’t need to meet them to know what they’re about. These people make a living off of criminal activities they’re involved in.”

  “Really? Rain seems pretty legal to me.”

  “Who knows what goes on there? You can’t just throw yourself into any old thing.”

  “I didn’t. I was fortunate enough to be paired with Snake at the grief gr
oup. The man’s amazing, patient, kind, and best of all he understands exactly what I’ve been through.”

  “Have you asked him how his family died? I bet it had something to do with the life he’s living.”

  “That’s enough,” Estelle barked.

  Jole flinched.

  “I understand that this seems to be out of nowhere. I know I’ve leaned on you more than I should’ve over the years, and you’ve gotten used to taking care of me, but it’s time we both reestablish boundaries and learn our new roles. Snake lost his family before he joined the club. They gave him a place to belong and something to live for. He was the victim of a hate crime. You’re so hell bent on painting him out to be this shady character. Fact is, he’s the one who’s been victimized by those considered upstanding citizens. I’m not asking you to agree with the decisions I’ll make or be comfortable with them. But I do expect you to respect them. Never bad mouth Snake to me. He did what no one else could.”

  “And what’s that, Estelle?” Jole asked.

  “Made me feel alive again.”

  Jole glanced down at her hands.

  Checkmate.

  “I won’t insult you by pretending to know how you’ve felt all this time. But I won’t stand by and watch you make mistakes that might ruin you without voicing my concerns.”

  “And I would expect nothing less. I’m not the same woman I once was. I never will be. I’ve accepted that. I need you to do the same.”

  “I’m not trying to—”

  “You are. I see it in your eyes every time I do something that would be out of character. I don’t even know who I am anymore. Knowing that I’m being held up against a set of norms which no longer exist for me is exhausting. I need to explore, take risks, and step outside of the box. This is my second chance to get things right. I was happy before, but I can’t try to recreate that old life.”

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t know you feel that way,” Jole said.

  “I didn’t either. Not until recently. I’ve been putting in a lot of work on my own and with the doc. I’m navigating a brave new world. I don’t want to let you down, but I have to do me.” The words erupted from her soul like a carbonated drink shaken and released from its plastic prison. The fear that had chained and gagged her released her from their manacles. Over the past couple of months, she felt as if she’d been living a double life.